Friday off but at the DMV

There are no ordinary cats. - Colette

Friday is my favorite day of the week. Friday after work is heaven, two full days off.. Ahhhh! Sleep! TV! Stay up all night reading! Beer! Partay! But this week I worked my 40 hours, which as a software contractor I can't exceed. So by the end of Thursday at 1 PM, I had Friday off, (not that I can normally do this, we had two production installs that went late.)

So anyway, the big thing was to not sleep until 1 am and miss public ice skating at the rink (On weekdays nobody is there and it's glorious) and I did that. Yay! Had a great skate. Then I was wondering what to do with myself and then thinking about the driver's license renewal form I got in the mail, and it's a "during the day" thing you have to do, so I said, oh whatever, I'll just go do it. Of course that involved putting on makeup, almost calling it off because my hair was too dauntingly bad, but then I decreed that it was good 'nuff from the front, and went.

AT the DMV there are two lines of maybe 15 people, and I know how long each one takes from past experience, which I was hoping to avoid, but there it was. I should have turned right around and driven home. But no, I couldn't bear to waste the trip ( Um, 10 minute drive tops? ) , and thought "Maybe they somehow speeded it up since then." Once I got in line it was more time invested, and I kept trying to convince myself I had made the right decision. After an insufferingly long hour or more I was finally up. Why oh why didn't I didch.

I was acutely aware of the even longer line and the people still suffering there, who were all watching me, ( just like I had previously been) to make sure I wasn't being the slightest pain in the ass and didn't make it take any longer than necessary. If you did we would instantly deem you some selfish lowlife with no thought for others, and you would be scorned in your community for life, as long as we all didn't instantly erase the entire DMV experience from our brains the second we were out the door, which of course everyone did. So, I tried to make sure everything went fast. The form submittal and payment went lightening fast, then the picture.

After the camera faintly whirrs you get a picture preview on the monitor, which is way more close up than you expected. They then ask you if you want it, and if you hate it ( which I did, I looked scary insane) they give you two more tries. Acutely aware of waiting people. "Remember Us! It's up to you!"" As soon as it's your turn it's of course finally all about you and the waiting is forgotten (And the Dante's hell of waiters no longer exist) so you have to be careful and not get carried away and take forever.

So then they took a second one, I tried to position my face and expression to be the most flattering and it was a grimace.. good lord. He said I had one more try, and there were two more horrible pictures where I was looking down and illegal (waiting for the picture to come up on the monitor) and strike three and I was out. It's horrible of course. And I have to live with it for four years unless I move to a different state.

I think I just need to relax. The best pictures of me are always when I'm drunk or relaxed and it's unexpected. As soon as I know there might be a dreaded picture my face starts trying to make itself not have an awful picture which probably makes the most awful pictures of all.

Or maybe I'm really THAT ugly.. Nooooooo.